Humor (RSS)

Wednesday, June 20, 2007 12:29 PM

For those of you who played lots of Atari....

This is awesome!

Go down the side... there are two more :)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Wednesday, March 29, 2006 7:00 AM

Alright, MacGyver, what are you going to do now?

I read a lot of poker blogs, as I mentioned before, and this one guy, CJ, who is one of the posters on the Up For Poker Blog, referred to a hilarious post he made to his personal blog about getting stuck on a balcony in Monte Carlo.  He was out there to do a big poker tournament.

Good stuff...
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, March 21, 2006 9:24 AM

Miscellaneous


That's all for now. :)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, March 21, 2006 6:07 AM

FSM Sighting in Baltimore...

This is great.  Someone actually (last October) had a Flying Spaghetti Monster billboard in Baltimore (on Falls Road, for those locals)...

My favorite quote from this discussion:  "Arguing on the Internet is like running in the Special Olympics - even if you win, you’re still retarted."

(NOTE:  The guy misspelled "retarded"... How ironic is that?)

All hail the Divine Noodly Appendage...

Ramen.
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, March 16, 2006 7:25 AM

A blast from the past...

Sometimes someone writes something really poignant and funny that touches on pop culture references and my own memories that touches me.  I'm was sitting in my basement at 7am laughing all by myself.  I still have a smile on my face when I think about it.  Things like this are great.  I wish I was as eloquent as Wil Wheaton is at recounting old memories.  We all have memories like this, but he just has a knack for phrasing it for optimum smile-factor.
posted by Tom with 3 Comments
Friday, January 27, 2006 10:44 AM

Possibly the greatest rant ever...

I am in awe of this guy's Mad (not-safe-for-work) Ranting Skillz!

Good stuff
posted by Tom with 309 Comments
Friday, December 02, 2005 8:12 AM

Grag Bag

I often find myself blogging just 2 lines and pointing to another news article online.  I decided that, rather than stopping doing this, I would just combine a bunch together to make it a little less lame.

So, here goes:

1) For all those annoying people who say "It's ridiculous to stop serving peanuts on a plane" and "oh.. you can just take the nuts off that cake and eat it", here is an example of why people need to be more sensitive to food allergies.  If that doesn't make you think more about it, then you're (notice I actually used an apostrophe and "re" there... huh?) a heartless bastard and you can go screw yourself.

2) Sick of navigating the labyrinth of "press 1 for toys, 2 for lubricants, etc"?  (what!?)  Well, this guy is great.  He's got a website that gives shortcuts to phone systems to that you can talk to something with a pulse.

3) This is just plain hilarious.  It's like something out of a bad sitcom..

4) I was just talking with someone about idiots burning stuff down with turkey friers...  It's pretty common, apparently.

5) Thankfully, some people in the middle east are acting (a bit) rationally about the terrorist attacks out there.  Apparently, Al-Zarqawi's family in Jordan has disowned him for attacking innocent children.  I don't know why this kind of thing took so long, but it is very welcome to me.

6) Google proves that you don't have to let the business weenies run everything.

That's it for this one..
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Friday, November 18, 2005 8:36 AM

Can Mighty Mouse and Danger Mouse be far behind?

Take one part Stuart Little, one part this procedure and a cape and you have Mighty Mouse.  Add an eye patch and you have Danger Mouse.  Ditch the cape and use a sombrero and you have Speedy Gonzales (Ariba!)

I, for one, welcome our new fearless talking mouse overlords....
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Wednesday, November 16, 2005 6:55 PM

I pity the fool who gets lost!

So, according to this MSNBC article, you will soon be able to get your navigation system to give you directions using Mr. T's voice, amongst other things.  It is truly a sad day for Mr. T's finances when he stoops to saying “Mr. T gonna get you there in one piece … you gonna be there safely, or else!” (when are we going to start chastising our celebs for using horribly asinine grammar?).

I miss the Mr T that everyone feared, not the one that we ridicule and pity (no pun intended).

I wonder if this is the start of something new...

Things Mr. T might start doing for money next:
  • Mr. T on my car alarm or my microwave ("Yo food be done, fool!"). 
  • Rent him for a party and have him walk around saying catch phrases and growling. 
  • Drug him and put him on an airplane and have a good chuckle about it when we land. 
  • Rent him for kids to ride around the yard instead of a pony.
How embarassing...
posted by Tom with 449 Comments
Wednesday, November 09, 2005 9:20 AM

Men are simple creatures...

I can't help but wonder if someone made up this headline just to attract more male readers to Ananova...

It's a good formula: 2 parts nfl cheerleader, 1 part bathroom, 1 part sex and a dash of Johnny Law... it's almost perfect!

posted by Tom with 1 Comments
Monday, October 31, 2005 10:58 AM

From the "Duh!" Department...

George Takei has come out of the closet. 

You know the one; it has no clothes in it, is completely transparent and everyone can see into it.  The one with people all standing around saying "Doesn't he know we can see him in there?".

For those who can't envision this, here's an artist's (my) rendition:

(NOTE: You can see him...) I mean tell me this man is straight:



OK, all stupid stereotypes aside.  Who cares?  If people don't stop pointing out things like this, things will never be any different.  It is just like people who point out that (fictitious person) Mary Johnson was the first Lesbian African American Superintendant of Schools for Wichita, Kansas.  Again, where do you draw the line?  When is it just not significant? 

If people want to be treated like what they do/are/feel is normal, they have to stop making a big event out of their "normal" lives/activiites.
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Wednesday, September 07, 2005 7:19 AM

An interesting way to give money away

The only problem I have is that you can't guarantee that people who deserve to get money will actually get it.

It's just whoever happens to be there.

Just like one 14-year old hypocrit there says: "Why aren't they donating this to the hurricane fund or something?".  Well... if you care so much donate what you receive!  (I'll cut her a break because she's 14...)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Wednesday, September 07, 2005 7:14 AM

Sometimes, your gargoyle just needs a break...

Sally Beyor thought someone stole her gargoyle from her front yard.  Little did she know, he just went on vacation. :)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Monday, August 15, 2005 7:02 PM

What's that old adage?

"Those who can, do and those who can't try to crush the spirit of those who can?"

I know it's something like that...

Here's Wil Wheaton getting a little revenge on one of his teachers, who must have been a complete bitch.

posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, August 04, 2005 10:24 AM

Well, it isn't Vapoorize, but it's still cool

I thought someone was trying to spoof the movie Envy with Jack Black and Ben Stiller in which Jack Black invents a spray (Vapoorizer) that vaporizes animal feces, but I was wrong.

These guys invented a spray that freezes your dog's crap to a stick so you can pick it up without needing to wash your hands later.

I'm sure this is especially helpful if your dog had Mexican food recently...
(originally found on Boing Boing)

posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Saturday, July 16, 2005 10:29 AM

Maybe you should plan your wardrobe for when you plan on being arrested...

Well, I'm sure he wasn't planning on being arrested, but this is one shirt this guy wishes he wasn't wearing for his mugshot.

Thanks to BoingBoing

posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Saturday, July 16, 2005 9:04 AM

Girls will be boys...

I have always told people that, if I had children, I would want them to be girls until they are around 10 years old.  This way, you can have the cute little girls, but not have to deal with them dating, which is every father's nightmare in my mind. 

This was always said in jest and with a smile.  That is, until recently when someone told me that, if I want to I could go to the Dominican Republic and get a child just like that!  No, this isn't a lie.  Here is a story (NSFW) from the Urological Sciences Research Foundation about the "Guevedoces" (literally "penis at 12 years").  These are people that are "female" until puberty and then, mystically, grow penises!  There are explicit pictures at this site, so don't visit this from work.

That is crazy.

T

Update: Seems like this is spreading.  Apparently some 21 year old woman from Myanmar always dreamed of being a man.  Well, she got her wish: her breasts disappeared and she grew a penis overnight.  Here's the link
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, July 14, 2005 9:06 AM

Gee... think this guy's seen the Jackass Movie?

This just makes me say OUCH

Of course they actually inserted them, didn't just grip them...

Thanks to Dave Barry for my daily shudder...

T

posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, June 30, 2005 8:11 PM

Ummm... Doesn't this guy know about the Internet?

I mean... if you want to watch women take dumps, there are plenty of places for that on the Net, I'm sure...
But, this guy decides it's a good idea to climb INSIDE AN OUTHOUSE TANK

*shudder*
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, June 28, 2005 11:58 PM

It's JOHANN!!! (Someone at Yahoo needs to wake up.)

Check out this news headline 

That is really funny.  On a good note, it'll be interesting to see how this composition is accepted by Johann Sebastian Bach's fans.

I wonder if it was written by a protege or something...

We'll never know.

Thanks to Emily for showing me this in the first place
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, June 28, 2005 1:00 PM

Yeah, but wait until they start killing us all...

Doctors are making zombie dogs by reviving them hours after death
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, June 28, 2005 12:55 PM

Guys are so stupid... AND.. Smart!

This is great... a guy decides to "fake" swallowing his friends truck key, but swallows it.  The doctor tells him it'll take 2-3 days to pass.  His friend needs his truck.  So, they take the X-Rays to a locksmith and the locksmith makes a key from the X-Rays!!

That's cool..

Here's the original article.  I saw it first on Dave Barry's Blog

Gotta love ingenuity!

posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Sunday, June 26, 2005 12:21 PM

Welcome to my blog's new home..

This is the new home of my blog.

Thank you for following me here.

I apologize, but the comments did not make it over with the porting of the archives (it was just too much effort).

I hope this works a little better for all you readers out there (*cough*).

Tom

P.S. Anyone that's interested can also check out my MythTV blog (very geeky topic though)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Wednesday, April 13, 2005 4:25 PM

You know you want to....

Adblock



I originally got this here. Thanks Sherilla.
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, February 17, 2005 4:22 PM

In the "Life Imitating Art" category...

Remember that Seinfeld episode where Newman kept a bunch of mail in his apartment because he didn't want to deliver it (it was cold out or something)?

Well, some slacker decided to try that out in real life. And apparently, "it's not uncommon..." !
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, February 10, 2005 4:21 PM

The Australian: Kite-flying event claims 13 lives [February 07, 2005]

The title pretty much says it all...
Kite Flying? Man... tell me Darwinism's not looming large in this one.

The Australian: Kite-flying event claims 13 lives [February 07, 2005]
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Wednesday, February 02, 2005 4:17 PM

This guy's got a death wish...

Two words for you:
Big. Brass. Balls.
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Saturday, January 29, 2005 4:15 PM

I always though I didn't want to go to a nursing home...

I was wrong!
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Saturday, January 22, 2005 3:11 PM

Do you think cell phones are too small and push-buttony?

Push-buttony? (I don't know... seemed right at the time)

I came across this article through Slashdot.org (a geek news site). Apparently, some geek decided that he wanted a big, honking old-fashioned-looking rotary cell phone! There are lots of pics and descriptions of the construction process there for those who are interested. Get out your propellor hats and give em a spin!

Slashdot article is here
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, January 20, 2005 4:10 PM

'Giant' 17-pound baby born in Brazil

Can you say "ouch" ?

'Giant' 17-pound baby born in Brazil
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, January 04, 2005 3:39 PM

Well, a new year is here...

... and what better thing to do that read a nice wrap-up of last year written by Dave Barry
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Friday, December 10, 2004 11:32 PM

So doc... I really can't deal with all these parking tickets... what should I do?

Apparently, I should cover money in *** to pay them
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Friday, December 10, 2004 3:37 PM

Maybe Iranian women will revolt and kick some ass now...

2000 year old Iranian warrior woman found...

Thanks to Fark (not really safe for work) for tipping me to this (and much more of my favorite 'news' stories)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, December 07, 2004 3:34 PM

Le Keystone Cops

So, when you're bent over a metal table with some guy elbow deep in your ass, you can blame it on the French...
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, November 30, 2004 3:31 PM

Poker Tranny?

I am sitting here watching some Tivo'd Poker (Limit) and I'm watching Patty Gallagher play. I could swear that she looks like a guy/trans-sexual (she has boobs). :)

Maybe it is a subconscious thing, since she was playing a guy named An "Tran" :)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, November 09, 2004 3:28 PM

For those of you with a sense of humor...

After this election, we all need some humor.

Nobody, at least as far as I'm concerned, does it like The Onion.

That's some funny stuff :)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Friday, November 05, 2004 1:26 PM

Oh, won't somebody think of the CHILDREN!

Umm.... Uhh... Good thing there were no late-night after school activities!!
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Saturday, October 30, 2004 3:16 PM

Happy Halloween!

Hopefully you don't drink too much and look like this:


posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Tuesday, October 26, 2004 3:19 PM

We?

No... I'm not talking about that estrogen-laced cable channel.

I'm talking about commenting on your sports team. When my friends and I are talking about a sports team, like the Baltimore Ravens, I say "we". As in: "We did really well on defense, but our offense is still impotent". My wife always rolls her eyes and asks me if I'm on the team.

Yes! I'm on the team! :) I'm the proverbial "12th man". I'm a season ticket holder (since they came to Baltimore) and, as far as I'm concerned, it's very normal for people to talk about their teams like that.

What does everyone else think? Leave me a comment (all 2 of you!)
posted by Tom (Comments Off)
Thursday, October 21, 2004 3:20 PM

Remarkable!

Do you ever have one of those stream-of-consciousness things that pops in to your head for completely no reason? It happens to me constantly!

Just a little while ago, I was working and I remembered a kid on The Little Rascals (I think) that always said “remarkable” whenever anyone said anything. He always said it like: “Remaarkabuuul!!”.

No rhyme. No reason. Just happened.

Very weird.
posted by Tom (Comments Off)